From Kyong Suk Kim’s Meditation Journal

September 7, 2024, 10:30 PM. This evening, I emerged from the fourth Jhana, closed my eyes, and focused on my breath, feeling the sensations in my body. Then, I noticed a peculiar movement in my heart. The substances in the heart area appeared like a miniature water fountain. The streams rose and vanished as if they were performing a water ballet, rising and falling in a mesmerizing rhythm. The streams had three distinct levels of height, each as wide as my palm. They were the color of clear water, and their movement mirrored the pace of my heartbeat. I was taken aback, my mind filled with the question, “What is this?” and the curiosity of whether I should continue observing.

“Okay, let’s watch,” I said and watched. After repeating the rising and falling for a while, I saw the streams’ height gradually decrease, and I felt that my heartbeats were slowing down also. When the streams stopped and disappeared, my heart seemed to stop, becoming quiet and almost unresponsive. I thought, “Oh, did my heart stop? Is this death?” but I kept watching the feeling a little longer. Then, I felt a stillness that seemed like death. However, I was still conscious and thought, “I should awake from meditation.” With a conscious decision, I slowly moved my hand, and it moved. I moved my toes, and my toes moved. Then, I slowly moved my body and tried to stand up. My head felt slightly empty, and my body felt weak and shaky. I slowly moved and relaxed my body. This experience differed from when I experienced the rise and fall of the four great elements in the body.